So a delightfully bizarre day in court today. We go to trial on an in-custody defendant, so of course we have a deputy in with us besides our normal baliff. So in a pre-trial hearing, the defense attorney claims that there is no way his defendant could've done any roadside exercises (they are not "tests"!!) because his leg is so messed up. Upon further review, we are told that his right leg was originally injured in combat by a flamethrower (EEEWWW!). So he gets a skingraft, and then....gets in a motorcycle accident a few years later that results in...you guessed it, his right leg meeting the pavement in a rather nasty case of road rash. Result? More skingrafts! So the guy does an in-court visual of his leg--I guess for "demonstrative" purposes....and his leg looks like Freddy Krueger's face. I mean it is seriously nasty looking. And the guy tells the judge that since he is "in-custody", that the jail hasn't been giving him the medicine that he requires for his leg. The judge is told that he needs something like Lubri-derm or vasoline for the damaged skin on his leg. So, are you with me so far? Cuz here comes the grizzly part. Put your food down.
He tells the baliff right before lunch....that his leg....the injured one.....is "leaking".
I guess when the skin dries, it cracks and then.....ugh. Just use your imagination.
My baliff, who's a total germophobe, totally wigs out and begins spraying everything in the courtroom that the guy might have touched.
So I'm thinking it can't get any better than that. Then, after lunch, I talk to the guy's attorney, and we're just making idle chitchat and I start talking about the defendant's leg, and how it was injured...and that's where I heard that it was injured for the first time when the guy was in Vietnam. And then the defense attorney tells me:
"Yeah, while he was over there....the guy had like 70 confirmed kills."
And I have to read a verdict tomorrow that this guy might be guilty? If the verdict is guilty, and the defendant starts looking like he might be upset....its every man for himself!
Later,
Jeff
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