Movie update--7/25/04

Hello movie fans--time for another update from the movies I've seen recently.  Enjoy!

Hey there....got to check out some more films, thought I'd give you the heads up on. 1) Jerry Seinfeld:  Comedian---I have a few friends who have been trying for years to get me to go to one of those "open mic" nights at the local comedy clubs.  I keep politely declining, figuring that even though a lot of people tell me how funny I am, I can picture myself going up and totally bombing.  Now I have another reason why I would never want to do that in a million years.  I'm a huge Seinfeld fan, love the t.v. show, watch the reruns over and over and over so I watched the film with a little anticipation, figuring at the very least I'd get to catch some new material from Jerry in concert.  I then watched this and realized the one thing that most of the guys who are working onstage at places called "Uncle Funny's", or "Crackers", or the "Comedy Stop" or some different variation of that name are incredibly insecure, depressing people that aren't much fun to hang out with anyway.  Here's an inside chance to watch Jerry worry, then stew, then worry some more, then become surly....and then go onstage and deliver 5 minutes of really funny material.  Only problem is that we're talking about 5 minutes of really funny material in an 80 minute movie.  We also get a brief look at his wife, who I remember mainly because she left her first husband on her honeymoon when she met Seinfeld.  Nice wife.  I'm sure Jerry trusts her implicitly.  * (and that's for his 5 minutes on stage) 2) American Splendor---Now here's an incredibly interesting film that isn't for everybody, but if you want to try for something a little different, you'll really enjoy.  Harvey Pekar is a real guy, who worked in the Cleveland, Ohio, V.A. clinic as a file clerk for like 25 or 30 years.  He basically lead a life of quiet desperation, as his wife had left him because she felt he was a real zero.  Pekar began writing his frustrations on life out on paper and showed them to his friend, the underground pulp artist Robert Crumb.  So began the comic book that dealt with the very minute of Pekar's life, which was called American Splendor.  The veteran character actor Paul Giamatti, best known as "Pig Vomit" from the Howard Stern bio "Private Parts", doesn't just portray Pekar as much as he crawls into his skin and becomes him.  This is a fantastic performance, down to some very subtle gestures, such as the way that Giamatti slouches like Pekar does, seemingly beaten down by life itself.  What also makes the movie interesting is the way that it interposes cartoons from Pekar's own comic book within the movie itself, and very effectively at that.  This is a quirky, slightly strange movie--much like Pekar himself---yet well worth going out of your way to see.  ****1/2 3) Underworld---Did you know that for over a thousand years that vampires & werewolves have been secretly at war with one another...right under our very noses?  Well, that's the basic premise of this movie, which essentially could be described as one part Dracula vs. The Wolfman, one part Romeo & Juliet and a final dose of the Matrix.  One thing you have to say about those vampires--they all seem to look terrific considering that their basically the undead.  Kate Beckinsdale, who is really hot, but as an actress is...well....really hot, plays a "death dealer" who goes out at night looking for 'wolves.  (Has she tried singles bars?)  Everyone seems to dress as though they've got great connections with someone in the leather apparel industry and the opening scene of the movie certainly does reach out and (no pun intended) grab you by the throat.  That being said, this movie is the antithesis of American Splendor.  This movie is all look and no heart or soul.  American Splendor is sort of frumpy and wrinkled, but what a heart. ** 4) Election--every once in awhile a movie comes along that makes you want to jump up and run to the phone to tell someone about.  Holy crap is this a great movie.  Twisted, perverse, biting commentary on high school, on elections, on popularity and what some people will do for it and for a little bit of power.  Reese Witherspoon plays Tracy Flick, who is running for senior class president ("Pick Flick") and doesn't care by God who she steps on to achieve her goal.  Standing in her way is history teacher Jim McAllister, played by Matthew Broderick, who (no lie!) is absolutely fantastic as he tries to thwart Tracy in her bid for power.  The reasons why he wants to do that are plot spoilers, so I won't give them away, but within the halls of Carver High School we got:  adultery, impotence, lesbians, bowls of free Juicy Fruit gum, 480 frosted by hand cupcakes, one overstocked refrigerator that is watched a little too closely by the janitor, an unopposed wheelchair bound vice presidential candidate who's motto is--"I'd stand up for you...if I could" and a series of prayers to God by a couple of the characters that is priceless.  Oh yeah, and a bee-sting to the eyelid.  Run, don't walk and get a copy of this movie. *****   Later, Jeff   On to sports!!  Ya know, just when I'm feeling crappy because my Cubs let a stiff like Eric Milton take a no-hitter into the 9th against them...and then of course they tie up the game...and promptly blow it...I'm feeling pretty lousy.  Then I watch the press conference at Miami Dolphins headquarters where your team's offensive MVP announces 5 days before training camp that he's quiting football because he wants to go "travel the world".  OH MY!!  Geez, suddenly the Cubs crappy day sort of pales in comparison, don't ya think?  Only a few more days until training camp...makes you wonder if the 'Fins will be dropping a quarter into the payphone and calling Minnesota, where my Vikings have a glut of young running backs.  Uh, Mr. Ugunleyea to Minnesota anyone?  Here's where if the Vikes get the call, they really need to be ruthless and try to screw the Dolphins bad.  If the 'Fins want Michael Bennett or Onterio Smith....make them pay through the friggin nose. More later....maybe. Jeff