The Cone of Death. It sounds like something from "Get Smart!" or an Austin Powers movie. Unfortunately for us, it has become a weekly occurence for the people of the state of Florida. And what a huge pain in the ass it is also. Once again we had to throw up the protective plastic wrap around our desks, always on the ready against the 180mph winds should the windows on the 3rd floor of the courthouse be ripped asunder. Ahem. Hopefully the hurricane will do what the weather guys seem to think its going to do and take a late turn northwest, away from us. Mind you, I understand that my parents are north of here....and my sister and her family also. I'm not wishing the storm on them, I want the damn thing to take the turn north and go back out to sea---or maybe hit Virginia. They haven't had a good storm of the century in awhile, have they?
So, I had a pretty interesting day today (besides the whole Cone of Death thing).
And it made me start thinking. Here I write my journal everyday, and I know a lot of you read it, and I suppose I've cheated myself on a few occasions. I know my father reads this, whether on a daily basis, I'm not sure. But there have been a few times when I've sort of "toned down" a story because I wrote with the knowledge that this would be something that my father might be reading. And as I thought about it today, and of some of the stories that happened today, I decided that, as someone once wrote....."to mine ownself...I must be true." So Dad, if your reading this....be forewarned....I might be getting a little blue in the next few paragraphs.
Things might be getting a tad.....salacious. (Meanwhile, all my guy friends are going ALRIGHT! Now we're going to get to the good shit!) Anyway, I write this warning out of respect for him.....so he can jump ahead to the movie review if he wants.
So because of the Cone of Death today, we were forced to take a lunch at work.
So I head towards the breakroom, and guess who should be walking out of the office....heading for the same location--at the same time?? Yep, ole Ms Used to be Me # 1 her own self. So naturally she doesn't acknowledge me as we're walking out the door, and naturally I begin to give her shit about it. So we walk into a semi-crowded breakroom across the hall....and as we both walk in, we notice that the only two seats available are DIRECTLY ACROSS FROM ONE ANOTHER!!!
Me, I'm thinking....fuck it, I gotta eat. She hesitates for a second herself and then sits down. And don't kid yourself if you think that every eye in the joint aren't on the two of us. So then she sits down, and as I begin to engage in some lunchtime discussion about the hurricane and other such nonsense, she just joins right in. I mean like we had known each other for 20 years. WHOOPS! Okay, maybe that was a bad analogy. How about, like we had talked to each other continously without any hostility or underlying tension for 20 years. Is that better? So after a few minutes of this, into the breakroom walks the lovely and talented Ms Debbie Blay, who sits down NEXT to the former Mrs Me # 1. Now what makes this an especially interesting scenario for some of you who don't know is......Debbie was my excuse some years back. She was the one that I said that I was having a relationship with (Oh not really! I was speaking hypothetically). So as she's sitting there, I'm thinking that old Mrs Me # 1 has to wondering just what in the hell this woman is doing sitting next to her. But, to her credit, she remained quite chatty, as we continued discussing courthouse gossip and the like (can you believe it? People in our office actually GOSSIP!). So eventually, the former finally leaves and after a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Debbie looks at me and says:
"Well....that was interesting."
"Shit, that's the most I've talked to her in over 6 years."
"I can't believe she talked to me."
And over in the corner, Senor Richie Lopez says to me....
"Damn man, were you guys really married?"
"Seemingly like a thousand years ago."
"Man, you must be some kind of a playa."
What was really interesting was when I went up to ask her a question about work while she was on the phone. She waved me off. Thinking that she had slipped back into her "normal" personality, I walked away. When she came up to me later, she explained that she had waved me off because of who was on the phone.
Old Mr. You-Know-Who.
Oh.
Yeah, I can see where it mighta gotten a little uncomfortable if he had heard me in the background.
Ya think?
So apparently we had another pissing contest at work today. The chief judge decides, that in lieu of the hurricane's approach, that the courthouse will be closing at 3pm. Au contraire, sayeth the Big Kahuna. We will be staying until 5pm. This was all in response to the events of a couple of weeks back, when our boss gave us the day off before he had the approval of the chief judge. God forbid he look after the wellbeing of his employees and all, but hey....I digress.
So as if all that wasn't enough.....I'm on the computer tonite and I get an instant message from someone in my past. (No, not HER silly) It was, the dreaded Michele "With one L"....otherwise known as the last woman I dated before my lovely bride. Now mind you, it had been a good 2 1/2 years since I had heard from her...and she had a new screen name and it was a bit of a shock! Even more shocking was the fact that she had returned to the Garden State. Michele was one of the women that I went out with between the former Mrs Me # 2....and the current (doesn't that sound like a terrible way to describe her? "The current"---as if I'm expecting something bad to happen eventually).....let's say God willing and the creeks don't rise.....THE LAST Mrs. Me. I also refer to that period of time between late '97 & summer of '99 as.....the last days of my reckless youth. Oh my.
It was a heady time indeed. And the dreaded Michele with one L was a pretty big part of that time. We always had a nice time going out with one another....and yet...something always seem to come up right before we firmly established ourselves as being in a.....(shudder)....."relationship". I can only figure that the reason that we did not end up together is that, much like nitro & dynamite....some things just should not be brought together without fear of a very large explosion.
And I'll get into that next time......
Later,
Jeff
PS...and PUH-LEEZE...after all the good shit I've given you tonite, do not even come to me with that bullshit about "where's the DVD review?" I'll get to it next time, unless something else really, really interesting happens to me.
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