6/5/05---Its all about teaching the children

So last night we take the kids over to the dreaded Applebee's for a little dinner.
We get there and our waitress is a little cutie named Sam who is talking a mile a minute.  She gives us the dinner specials for the evening, takes our order and leaves.

A few minutes later, at the table next to us, another waitress, named Danielle, comes over....reads the dinner specials to them...takes their order, and leaves.

When Sam comes back with our meals, I motioned for her to come over.  She leans over and I said:

"Ya know, I couldn't help overhearing Danielle give the dinner specials to the next table, and I must say....you did a MUCH better job of it."
"Really?"
"Oh totally."
"Well that is too funny, because Danielle is actually my best friend and now I can just go and throw this into her face."

She walks away and Kim rolls her eyes.  Kellie mentions to her mom how she has gone and married someone who is very weird....and Andy....well, he's just watching.
I look up and see that Sam has stopped Danielle not to far from our table and is telling her the story.  Danielle turns around towards us, a look of horror on her face.

"What?  I didn't say nothing!" I say..."It was him (I point to Andy)....he said it!"
"I don't like your table!" Danielle says in mock protest.

Later, as we're paying the bill....and I have my order in the "to go" box (the ribs really weren't that good to be honest with you)......I remind Sam that I asked for some sauce to go with my order---and that a mistake like that is just the sort of thing that can impact how big a tip she's going to get.

"But I put the sauce in there....I know I did." she says.
"I don't think so....let me check....."

And of course, it was already in there....and I got a lot of grief.  So we leave, and we're walking out to the car.....I pull Andy close to me and say....just loud enough for Kim and Kellie to hear of course....

"Son...I want you to realize what a valuable lesson I taught you tonite.  What I was doing in there is what is called...'flirting'.  Let me tell you...if I hadn't had the old ball and chain with me here tonight.....I would have gotten Sam's phone number.....
GUARANTEED."

So we get into the car....and Kim asks the kids if they knew what a ball and chain was.  Andy said it was a weapon that they used to use in the old days.

"And sometimes," I said...slightly sarcastically, "it had red hair."

Wife rolls her eyes, Kellie says I'm weird.......Andy learns how to flirt.  Maybe it will help him down the road.

But I could've gotten that phone number.  I swear.

Later,
Jeff