So the other day (Thursday), was a pretty interesting day. I took Wednesday off for a dentist appointment, but instead of seeing my dentist I went to my primary doctor--mainly because I had felt like crap for a few days. It just felt like yet another cold or flu was swooping down to put me on my back. Thankfully, my doctor prescribed some of that Z-pack or whatever its called and I felt much better the next day.
I'm glad I did....because things got interesting.
So I'm sitting at my desk right as work is getting ready to start and my friend Ceci walks by, and I say good morning. She looks a bit out of sorts and I ask her what's wrong.
"Eh, you know...something someone just said to me sort of bothered me."
"What'd they say?"
"Oh you know...just something that's stupid. It shouldn't upset me....but it did."
"Who was it?"
"I don't wanna say."
"Well at least tell me what they said."
She leaned forward and sort of half whispered that someone in the office had asked her if she was expecting.
DOH!
Now, to me....that's one of those questions that you don't ask a woman....unless you are 100% sure what the answer is--and the answer had better be yes. Otherwise, you look like an idiot, and you make the woman feel horrible. Its a stupid, stupid question to ask if you don't know the answer.
So she walks away feeling lousy about herself, and I feel bad because I don't know what to say to her.
A little while later I had to take a file to the other side of the courthouse, to a felony division. I dropped the file off and I get into the elevator. I'm standing there, minding my own business when a couple get on and stand next to me. The guy is ranting and raving about how he's been "add-charged", which means that the state attorney has decided to increase his charges---you could probably guess that its never a good thing to have happen, especially if your charged with a felony. So, there I am, and the elevator door closes....and I hear:
"Excuse me, is your name Jeff Bowdren?"
"Yes it is."
"Jeff, its me....Michele Brower."
"Michele Bro.....oh....Michele with one "L"!"
That had been what I called her. Back in the early part of 1999 when we were dating.
She was the last woman I dated before I met Kim. My last foray into bachelorhood before I met my wife. She was absolutely wild. She had losta lot of weight, and truthfully looked very good. The elevator opened, she said goodbye, and walked ahead of me with her boyfriend//husband//friend///who knows what? I walked behind her and thought about how different I probably looked to her. How the last few years I've put on weight--more than I'd probably care to admit. I found myself wondering if she was thinking to herself:
"Wow! He's really put on the weight!"
Or if maybe she was thinking.....
"Wow! He's really put on the weight! Of course, he doesn't have a felony add-charge like the loser I'm walking with, but........"
Michele was the woman that convinced me to marry Kim. I had been going out with Kim for a few years, and had been dragging my feet on making our relationship "permanent". Kim hadn't said anything, but I'm sure she was starting to wonder if I was ever going to fish or cut bait in the marital department. And one day online (those damn computers--they're relationship killers!), Michele IMed me and asked me to meet her somewhere. She even made a point of not being very subtle about her purpose for asking me.....and I declined.
I thought about declining that invitation for a day or two. I thought about what it would have meant if I had gone and seen her. How I had been, in the words of the musical group Squeeze....."Tempted by the Fruit of Another". There truly is nothing quite as tempting as.....temptation.
But thankfully, I declined her invitation. And a couple of days later, I realized that there was a reason I declined. And that was when I asked Kim to marry me.....while we were walking the dogs.....in the parking lot behind the office building.
I'm just an old fashioned romantic, aren't I?
So most of the rest of the day had gone by, and I had thought about what had been said to Ceci. I was trying to figure out a way to make her feel better....to make her ignore what the stupid person had said. Interestingly enough, the person who said it (she told me eventually) is well known in our office for her "spirituality", for quoting scripture......
Which I found especially interesting when I learned that one of her 3 children that she has (never married--ahem) was the result of a liason she had with a married man.
But hey, I digress.
Anyway, so Ceci comes back into the office and walks past my desk. It was just the two of us there and she still looked out of sorts.
"How ya doing?"
"Okay....I'm still thinking about what she said though. That really bothers me."
"Okay...can I just say something here? And, I hope you take this in the spirit in which I intend it and all.....but......I hope you realize that if I wasn't married to Kim.....and if you weren't married to Jorge......that you would need a restraining order to keep me away from you. You do know that, don't you?"
She looked at me for a moment. Then she laughed, and gave me a hug.
"I needed to hear that. Thank you so much."
Ya know....if telling someone that you would consider being their own personal stalker doesn't show you care....what really does?
Later,
Jeff
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