So now that I have your attention....here's how this story got started. I was talking with someone the other day about my dogs and how Kim having a dog played into our initial dating situation. (It was a positive--I loved the Beez!).
As I was recalling that....I started to think about some of the women I dated before I met Kim. Get a load of this.
I cannot for the life of me remember her name.
Marilyn? Lisa? Barbara? Something like that.
Her dog? Sid.
How sad is THAT? I forget the girls name, but remember her DOG. Well, Sid was a pretty cool dog. So here's the story....and its a pretty good one. I was doing the Love@aol.com thing, which truth be told was a hit or miss affair. I met some very nice women....and I met some borderline psycho's. This woman (ah hell, let's call her Marilyn) was somewhere in the middle. I had answered her ad, and we had sent each other some emails basically gauging interest I suppose. We moved forward to phone calls, and there was a mutual interest....and so we decided to make our first date. Now, mind you--this is basically a blind date situation so it is usually approaced--by both sides--with a little caution. Typically you agree to meet in some public area, like a restaurant or something, just to make sure the person isn't Dahmer or Ted Bundy. So I was more than a little surprised when she gave me her home address and asked me to come over and see her.
First problem--she lived about 1/2 mile away from the former Mrs Me # 2. Eeeww.
I could just visualize running into her at a restaurant or store one day. Not good.
So we meet, and she seems nice....looks would be "decent" to "okay". I mean, she wasn't drop dead gorgeous, but nothing hideous, ya know? So she invites me in her house (that was a plus--she OWNED her house) and I meet her dog Sid. What a great dog he was! Very cool. So I'm playing with Sid, goofing around, and Sid is having a big old time having someone roughhouse with him--and all the while I'm scoring huge points with her because she sees that her dog likes me. Trust me, that's important to women. So "Marilyn" and I sit down and begin chatting, maybe for like 5 or 10 minutes...just small talk sort of stuff....and she blurts out this line....which I swear to God I will never forget as long as I live....
"Well, I want you to know that as far as dating goes.....I, uh......do find you attractive....and if you'd like to pursue a potential relationship I would be okay with that."
All I knew was that this was good for me.
So we go out to dinner, and she tells me her story. Divorced, her father and family had lots of money from their own business and Dad had essentially bought her a house and she worked when she felt like it. Sugar daddy? Hell....this was a sugar mama!! Things were looking up!!
So our "relationship" began, and I would stop and visit her after work, and she made me dinner a few times....it was pretty nice stuff having someone wait on me hand and foot after # 2. However....storm clouds soon appeared. Here's why:
1) Let's remember that the beloved former # 2 HATED sports. I was determined to find a woman who at the very least tolerated sports....otherwise I would be pissing against the wind and basically getting into the kind of situation I had just left.
2) Part of the reason that I enjoyed the fact that she had a dog was that # 2 and I had a wonderful dog, the recently deceased Misty girl, and truth be told I really did miss her a lot and missed having a dog around after having one for 7 years or so.
So one night we get onto the topics of sports one night....and I'm asking her thoughts on football and hockey. And she lets fly the venom:
It seems that the reason she was divorced was, in small part....hockey. Apparently her husband and his best friend had season tickets to the Panthers and enjoyed going to the games. At some point in time, the friend had his schedule at work changed, and so her husband and his friends wife began going......uh....yep, you can guess what happened after that. Its a short drive to the No-Tell Motel for the forbidden fruit of another. So, eventually she finds out...and what happens besides divorce?
She develops a hatred for hockey!! Now, I'm troubled by this. I don't wanna go through another round of aggravation because my girlfriend hates sports. So now, I'm starting to consider my other options
And one of the reasons I'm a little torn is....quite honestly...I had started to get attached to Sid. I mean, do you stay in a relationship because you like the dog's company better than the woman's? How twisted is that?
And then I moved into one of my breakup modes, by doing something that I had always done---pre breakup. I start evaluating with a harsh eye....and trying to find some picky little thing about her that bothered me. Marilyn's problem? Get this.
She had no ass whatsoever. I mean that damn thing dropped right off the face of the earth. So one night, we're laying in bed....ya know...."post"....and after some cuddletime.....she gets up....nekkid....and I'm silently criticizing her lack of booty.
And she very graciously asks me if I want to get into the jacuzzi (did I mention that she had a jacuzzi?) while she made me something to eat. Hey, I'm no fool. I'm in the jacuzzi, jets swirling around...enjoying the spoils of my.....uh.....gigolo-esque ways, and I'm sitting thinking.....
This is perfect. If only she wasn't here.
Damn rich women! With their coniving, spoiling ways! And why did she have to have such a great dog?? And as I sat there....I knew it was over. I was sitting there wishing I was somewhere else. I thought how, if I was a real bastard, I could draw this thing out for another 6 months--or until hockey season started--and then end it.
But by then...there might be some very real feelings involved. I knew that she liked me, but I also knew that enough time wasn't involved to where she really was...ya know....in love with me. Well....hehe....maybe part of....ahem....nevermind.
Anyway, I got up. Dressed, told her that I had to head home. Gave her a goodnight kiss, gave Sid a scratch on the head and walked towards my car.
And I realized....that I had extended the relationship by at least 2 or 3 dates...because I really did like her dog.
Like I said in the last entry.....I'm a dog person.
Later,
Jeff
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