So....as you know, I went and had my sleep study done on Monday night. It went fine (and I'll go into details in a second)....except for the fact that the room was like 65 degrees and I froze my ass off. Even worse, I ended up picking up a cold and...ugh...I think there have maybe been 10 days since New Year's Day that no one in our house hasn't had a cold or some sort of flu. Its a huge pain in the ass!
Anyway, so Monday night I show up at the hospital and go for my study. The nurse who would be monitoring me---LaKeisha (no lie)---opened the door and before even saying hello says:
STOP RIGHT THERE! I need to take your photo for our records".
I'm thinking, oh great....I've got Queen Latifah for a nurse. A real hard ass. But, she ended up being pretty nice. So about 9:30pm, she comes in to begin hooking me up to the various electrodes and monitors.....I felt like John Hurt in The Elephant Man.
"I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!"
As she's putting all this shit on me, I get to watch myself, since the hospital had the good sense to put a mirror right in front of the bed. I complimented LaKeisha on whomever came up with THAT bright idea. So after I'm all hooked up, I read a little (latest Clive Cussler book--"Black Wind"---I'm about 125 pages into it--pretty good stuff for you Dirk Pitt fans) and announce that I'm ready to go to bed. Now, mind you....I can't move in either direction more than 10 inches. But still, LaKeisha tells me to "relax and try and sleep". SHAAAAAAA......that'll happen.
So the lights are off, and of course its pitch black....and no clock. I happened to have brought my cell phone and had put it on the night stand. Well, I finally drift off to sleep for what seems like a few hours....and as I wake up....and I'm laying there I'm thinking....
"That must've been enough time for them to get some sort of a reading....probably time for me to get up and go home now."
And I pick up my cellphone and flip it on.
2:40am.
DOH! So I doze off again....and wake up and think....
"Well by now they've DEFINITELY got enough for a reading. Time to get up!"
Pick up the cellphone and it says:
4:45am.
DAMN! This is one freaking long night! I dozed off again and this time woke up around 5:45am. I layed there for a couple of minutes and finally called out for LaKeisha, who's listening on a monitor.
"Can we finish this thing please?"
So the beast was finally released from his lab experiment and went home. And by the middle of the afternoon--the cold had hit me full on. Damn hospital with its germs! I end up calling in sick Wednesday, going in for half a day Thursday and really wasn't feeling that good until Friday. Luckily I was only scheduled for court on Friday since my judge is (doesn't it make you sick) skiiing in Colorado. Nice life.
Thankfully she returns tomorrow....which is good. I need to build up some vacation time and when she's not around I get week and go home early. Its a killer having to work an actual full day ya know.
Later,
Jeff
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